waste of space

I have been reading in Luke lately and Man it has been so awesome. The Lord is just speaking through me and its such an amazing feeling. There has been a number of things that I have been convicted of and its been a really humbling and awesome experience. So anyway, I thought I would share a little bit of just what I have read today. Its really powerful.

Jesus was again telling one of his parables. ---
Luke 13:6-9
And He began telling his parable: " A certain man had a fig tree which had been planted in his vineyard; and he came looking for fruit on it, and did not find any."
"And He said to the vineyard keeper, ' behold for three years I have come looking for fruit on this fig tree without finding any. Cut it down! Why does it even use up the ground?'
" And he answered and said to him, 'Let it alone, sir, for this year too, until I dig around it and put in fertilizer; and if it bears fruit next year, fine; but if not, cut it down."

That's like, scary.
Im thinking the owner of the fig tree represents the Lord and the Gardener (vinyard keeper) represents Jesus. And of course, we are the fig trees. The individual. God has every right to take our life from us whenever he wants. I feel like to me, this verse is talking about the believer. The believer who is not fully living his life for the Lord. God wants to see us produce fruit. He wants us to proclaim the love of Christ.. Not just to go about our day living our 'normal life'.
What are we here for? Why were we created?
Dont you think we should be proclaiming Jesus form the rooftops and telling everyone the grace and love and salvation we have found?
Just like the owner was upset that his fig tree had not produced any fruit, so is the Lord in our lives if we live it in vain. Doing the things that WE desire. Christ is our intercessor though. He is thereason that we can even have a relationship with God. He gives us living water and wants us to grow and get it... But if we dont, then our life could be cut short. God can take it away from us.
What really stuck out to me was in the verse when it said " Why does it even take up the ground?" --- meaning... if your not living for the Lord and spreading the gospel isnt gnawing at your bones... then your a waste of space.
Think about it.
What are you here for?
This really hit home today, has convicted me of my life and has encouraged me fully. There are lost souls all around us who dont know the real Love of the Lord.
God use me. give me strength not to be scared to share your word. Thank you for your grace and giving me chances time and time again.

Isaih 55:6-7 "Seek the Lord while He may be found; call on Him while he is near. Let the wicked forsake his way and the evil man his thoughts. Let him turn to the Lord and he will have mercy on him, and to our God, for he will freely pardon."

I was reading today in Galatians...

"5:19- The acts of the sinful nature are obvious; sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions, and envy; drunkenness, orgies and the like. I warn you as I did before that those of you who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God"

"22: But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control."

I looked upon both of these "lists" and picked out from each what I felt that I had and what I felt that I needed and needed to get rid of.
It was a good time of reflection. And I think I will read these verses everyday until it is burned in my mind. I want my heart to be pure. I often wonder, how can I change this dirty heart of mine.. with so many bruises and scars, its all I have ever known. Change is a good word for me, but sometimes it can seem impossible. Its not though. It just takes discipline... like reading these verses everyday... Pinpointing the exact things that I need to work on. Spending some serious time in prayer... maybe writing it on my hand so I can go through the day thinking about it.
I dont want to me just a mediocre Christian. I want to do something for the gospel where people think Im weird or think Im crazy. I want to be used. But first I have to get this heart of mine pure and I dont want to wait any longer. Ive been stagnant and I keep saying 'tomorrow'. But im not even promised that.
I dont want my sinful nature to hold me in what God has called me out of

Blessed are the PURE IN HEART. For they will see God.